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I Want To Be Queen (The Knave of Hearts)
Now, there were many things Alice knew, she was smart and cunning for sure. She'd read so many books in her lifetime she could fill up 436 Libraries to the top and still have a few left over for a coffee table. Still, she knew nothing about how one could become Queen, real Queen. How to defeat evil Queens who invaded her dreams when she slept at night and off-with-her-headed their way through a dream scape that happened years upon years ago. How did one rid the world of something like that? There had to be a way, and Alice was going to find it. Just, needed to ignore the pang of guilt for leaving Hatter's home without a note. She doubted the little GIRL-Hare would tell Hatter. As Hare didn't seem to like Alice at all.

Not that Hatter, no, Reginald liked Alice at all either. Running out on her when she was just trying to clean? The deeper into Ozland she seemed to drift, the more coherent her lines of thought were. It was frighteningly amazing. Frightening because she wasn't sure she should be sane when thinking of killing Queens or taking thrones.. Amazing because she did so miss rational thoughts and the clever conversations she had with herself.

Clever and Witty, that's what Alice was underneath this little blue dress (Which really hugged her curves more than she remembered as a child!), and the golden blond hair. She was smart. She was Clever. And by whatever powers she should have, wit and learning and all of that, should! Should! Make it easy for her to usurp the once Queen of Hearts and push Alice into the place she belonged! No! That she was born for!

Or something like that.

The road was a strange yellow brick now. Who had Yellow bricks? YELLOW? This sounded familiar. This sounded like something she knew. People sure were short around here. Or was it that Alice really was tall? Was Reginald right? She was tall now? Alice didn't feel tall. She felt leaner than she used to be, she'd been a little pudgy as a child, or so her mother had always said. But Tall?

Or maybe people were just short.


Alice skipped over the bricks and through the middle of the road, on her way towards the ever looming City.

What the hell kind of place had Wonderland become? Ozland? What the hell was OZ?

Hearts. Alice saw Hearts.


She wanted to gag. Hearts made her feel like her head was going to come off.

..she hoped no one noticed her coming. Surprise was the name of the game.

Tags: knave of hearts, alice

From: [info]stolethetarts Date: 11/28/2007 21:03:28  

Knave saw her coming. Knave saw everyone coming and going; it was sort of his job. But this particular person seemed oddly familiar. The hair was familiar, the face somewhat so as well. The dress... Knave's eyes narrowed. He remembered her, remembered her a good deal smaller - no, younger.

The girl from the other world, the one who'd shown up and thrown Wonderland into utter turmoil. She was a witness at the trial for the tarts, even though she hadn't know a damn thing about the tarts. Queen's fucking justice that was, calling a witness that had not a damn thing to do with the case.

Axe across his back and clothed in his uniform, hearts insignia prominent, Knave melted from the crowd that could never quite hide someone of his bulk and build. "And how the hell did you manage to find your way here? That's a thing with you then, is it?"
From: [info]sea_of_tears Date: 11/28/2007 21:07:50  

"AH!" Alice screamed, turned and saw the Knave. "AH!" Again because IT WAS THE KNAVE! Alice didn't know what to do, what to do. he worked. WORKED for the Queen of Hearts! Hearts were on his Uniform! He was just as big as she remembered. Did he still steal things too?!

Alice stood there watching him wide eyed. He was going to steal her soul now wasn't he? Or the scones she had in the pockets of her apron! Or her SWITCHBLADE! Oh no! Her only weapon!

"AHHH!!!" Alice bolted to the left tin a run, bowling over a team of kids with lollipops, who looked like old men but they were so short they had to be kids!

From: [info]stolethetarts Date: 11/28/2007 22:24:26  

She was quick and Knave wasn't expecting her to suddenly run like that. It was lucky for him the Munchkins got in her way; it gave him time to catch up to her. A large hand closed around her writs with enough strength for her to be unable to pull away, but gentle into not to hurt. "Relax, Blondie, I don't want your damn scones." Although... No, no, pay attention.

"I'm not going to hurt you." What the hell was her name again? Knave hadn't bothered to pay too much attention to it when she was just a trouble-making child. "And you might want to keep your voice down before you bring the rest of the brute squad over here. Trust me. One of me is enough."
From: [info]sea_of_tears Date: 11/29/2007 14:48:35  

"Brute squad?" Alice looked bewildered. It took a moment to process. Brute. Force. brute Force. hard Force. physical Force. Hurt. Pain. It registered on Alice's face moments later. Now she -was- scared. Much more scared than she was before!

"Eeee!" Alice tried to pull away, but it accomplished nothing. "I didn't even want one of you. None of you would be preferred!"
From: [info]stolethetarts Date: 11/29/2007 15:06:33  

Oh for the love of...

Knave hated when women freaked out like this, because it put him at a loss as to what to do. He knew he was large, imposing, and downright terrifying at times, and at the moment everything that normally kept people in line was working against him.

People, animals, robots - they all pulled away from them giving them a wide berth. "Look, don't make me have to cover your mouth. You're scaring the shit out of people and I'm not hurting you. I don't want to hurt you, I just want to ask a few questions." Like what the hell are you doing here.

"I don't care what you'd prefer. You've got me and I'm not letting go till you calm the fuck down and stop screaming already." Curse after curse fell from his mouth - his language got more foul the more irritated he got, and he was plenty irritated at the moment.

OOC: PS He TOTALLY does NOT have her arm all twisted up like in the icon; I just wanted to use it. >_>;;
From: [info]sea_of_tears Date: 11/29/2007 15:29:52  

"And the possom said to the crocodile, my dear I don't taste that good. in fact I;m quite bitter from my nose to the tip of my fleshy little tail. But you can eat me if you dare, but i warned you true and fair. I'm not a tasty thing, but go and do your thing." Alice babbled out nonsense, it was a safety measure, a hope that maybe he'd let go if he thought she was insane.

..That still worked right? She hoped it work. She continued. "The crocodile was surprised, to hear his dinner talking before his eyes. Talking of how it didn't taste the way he'd like it to on his plate. Bewildered and a bit disgusted he picked up his plate and dumped it off the table. The possom rolled off and onto the floor, and scurried it's self to the door."
From: [info]stolethetarts Date: 11/30/2007 12:25:15  

Great. Just what he needed, another fucking loony running around Ozland. Unfortunately for Alice, Knave was pretty accustomed to insanity. With a heavy eye-roll he shifted, clapping a heavy hand over her mouth. "Look. I get enough batshit insanity every damn day. Gimme something else will ya?" Knave didn't remember her being this crazy when she was a kid. Oh the things Wonderland did to the mind.

"Look blondie, I don't really remember your name right now, and I promise you, all I want to do it talk. No bullshit, not nonsense, and I will not hurt you. You understand me? I'm gonna let you go, but you yell, or scream or run, or pull anything else and I'll be on you again, got that?" He released her mouth first and then, after a moment, her wrist.
From: [info]sea_of_tears Date: 11/30/2007 20:42:13  

Alice wanted to run, above all else she was a good and fast runner. But she couldn't.. Not with the threat of being caught again. Especially if there were others near by..

Like the cards. Oh what if the cards came by?

Alice stood there stiffly, staring up at the Knave.

"It's Alice."
From: [info]stolethetarts Date: 11/30/2007 21:57:29  

"Good. Now we're getting somewhere." Knave crossed his arms and looked down at her. "Alice. That's right. In case you don't remember, I'm the Knave of Hearts. Welcome to Ozland. Speaking of which, I'm real curious as to why you're here, Alice. Chasing the White Rabbit again?" He cocked his head at her and waited for an answer.
From: [info]sea_of_tears Date: 12/02/2007 17:38:14  

"Not the White Rabbit no. I was looking for Wonderland all these years I've been away. No one believes me when I tell them it exists. But it does obviously or you wouldn't be here. Ozland on the other hand is new to me." She eyed his hearts and wanted to up heave all the scones she'd had this morning on them. Paint them blue or green, or perhaps a shade of orange like the Hatter's coa--.. She really needed to stop thinking about him.

"Why does it matter why I'm here? Does it? Am I important somehow?" Alice really just wanted to go on her Merry way and un-throne the crazy fat queen.
From: [info]stolethetarts Date: 12/02/2007 20:04:51  

"Ozland's new to a lot of us." Knave let his arms drop and just stared down at her. "Don't kid yourself. You're not that important. However, when you came to Wonderland, you threw it into total upheaval. The Queen especially was completely unprepared with how to deal with you." A pleased grin spread across Knave's lips at that thought. He liked seeing the Queen so flustered, so unsure of herself. Alice was a weakness to her. "I was merely wondering if you were planning to do it again."
From: [info]sea_of_tears Date: 12/03/2007 13:55:04  

"I do not think I am that important at all. So i agree with you there." Alice shuffled her feet a little, turning her head to watch a couple of short fat men doddle towards some silly candy stand. Like they needed it. Soon they'd be beach balls. But oh.

They'd be fun to bounce.

Alice looked up suddenly.

"You're smiling. You want me to cause trouble?"
From: [info]stolethetarts Date: 12/03/2007 15:56:03  

"That depends on the kind of trouble you're likely to cause. One's preferable over the other. For instance I don't like the kind of trouble that gives me more work to do. But I do like the kind that pisses off the Queen or at least gives her a really bad day." He watched her carefully, as if trying to gauge her mental capacity. She seemed mostly lucid. Sometimes.
From: [info]sea_of_tears Date: 12/05/2007 14:23:12  

"Um, Well." Alice fidgetted. She wasn't sure if she should have told him her plan or not. or even hint at there possibly being a plan at all.

"I..Might be?"
From: [info]stolethetarts Date: 12/05/2007 15:03:57  

Knave knew he was making her uncomfortable and he didn't try to curb his overbearing behavior in any way. "Might be want? Might be planning to cause trouble? Might be planning to give me more work? Might be planning to piss of the lunatic running this place? How about you be just a bit more specific as to what you mean by 'might be'?"

He crossed his arms again, looking down at her. She was nervous and fidgety, but Knave was almost certain there was something concrete going on in that flighty-seeming mind of hers. He wondered if there was anything truly useful she could tell him.
From: [info]sea_of_tears Date: 12/05/2007 20:43:09  

"I don't want to piss her off." I want to kill her. Alice looked innocently around. Would the Knave join her? The Hatter abandoned her! Abandoned! She watched him a moment.

"I do not like that she was Queen again. I don't want her there. But I do not know how to go about getting her off the throne." Her voice was soft now. Whisper. She didn't want anyone to hear her.
From: [info]stolethetarts Date: 12/05/2007 21:00:45  

"Few of us like the fact that she's queen," Knave responded, his own voice lowered. "But we all like our heads just where they are."

His lips quirked up into that semi-smile again. "You want her off the throne? There are few people who'd dare think that much less say it." He leveled a gaze at her, and then taking her arms gently he tugged her out of the middle of the road, where people still swarmed around them. "Something tells me the rest of this conversation needs some privacy." Away from the people meandering about Knave picked up where he'd left off. "So. You say you want her off the throne. Many of us do. Who do you think deserves to be there instead?"
From: [info]sea_of_tears Date: 12/12/2007 22:37:05  

"Me, of course." It made perfect sense to Alice. "I'm smart, I really am. And I'm far less likely to off with anyones head. I'm very good with people! and I know all of you already. I'd be a perfect queen." Alice crossed her arms.

"She really is horrible. She shouldn't be queen either way. Even if it's not me. I want her out."
From: [info]stolethetarts Date: 12/12/2007 23:43:10  

Knave raised one dark eyebrow before letting it settle. "You? Queen? You think self-proclaimed smarts and sparkling personality is enough to win you the throne? Who makes you think you'll keep it even if you succeed?" He was being intentionally harsh; he wanted to see just how much of a backbone this girl had. Hey, if she wanted to rule a kingdom, she needed more than an idle promise to be good.

He sort of agreed with Alice though. The present Queen of Hearts was nothing short of terrifying, and Knave wanted her at the very least off the throne. But preferably dead. "And do you have any plans to get her out or is this just a fanciful daydream?"
From: [info]sea_of_tears Date: 12/16/2007 22:49:34  

"Nothing fanciful about it. Anyone would be better than that far queen of hearts. No more offing with heads, and no more trials for knaves who take tarts. Tarts would be free." Alice clapped her hands together. She really didn't need to be queen, it would have been nice, but it wasn't needed. She just needed the cow in red off the throne so that the world would be right, as right as she could make it that was.

"Don't you see? There's tons of placed without evil queens. We don't need her Knave. Wonderland should start an uprising. Throw her off the throne.. OZland should."
From: [info]stolethetarts Date: 12/17/2007 17:56:25  

"Oh, I'm well aware we don't need this lunatic running Ozland," Knave said mildly, his voice so low only Alice could hear him. Knave knew well some people already blamed the loss of Wonderland on her insanity. And others would blame Alice, because nothing had ever gone wrong before the girl from another world showed up.

He smirked. "Though you bring up a good point about the tarts." He exhaled slowly. "Look, blondie, I'm going to tell you this only once. If you're going to make this your mission, you'd best watch your head. You know Her Royal Loonyness; if she gets even a whiff of this, that pretty blond hair will be gracing the queen's newest shiniest guillotine, you got me?"
From: [info]sea_of_tears Date: 12/18/2007 14:01:05  

"She'd have to drag me kicking and screaming all the way to it and I doubt she'd be able to. I have friends, you know. And I'm sure all of these.. short people I keep seeing around here wouldn't stand for a girl like me to be headless."

Alice liked her head where it was. Thank you very much.

"She needs to go. How many have lost their heads since I left?"
From: [info]stolethetarts Date: 12/22/2007 11:22:51  

"I tend not to count," Knave answered. "But that alone should tell you it's been too many." A slow smile spread across his face. "All right, tell you what. You come up with a plan. You want her off the throne, then you figure out how the hell you plan to do it without getting killed. My advice? Don't underestimate the king."

He stepped away from her then giving her another long perusing glance. She was still kind of skinny, but she was growing up well, filling out nicely. "I'll see what I can do to make sure you don't get yourself in too much trouble." It wasn't exactly a commitment to help, but the suggestion that he might just watch her back was there.
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